Airplane
by Raserei Hojo
Summary: Bad Luck, Sakano, Tohma, K and Eiri are all on a plane, riding to New York to visit Ryuichi and Riku. The problem? Yoshiki is on the plane, too. And, well, Tohma isn't good at keeping his composure around her.


"Are we there yet?"

Everyone who was still awake shot a glare at Shuichi.

"I guess not."

It was ten hours into their flight to New York and the flight was estimated to be 15 hours long if they didn't have any delays. There was only so much Shuichi could sleep before boredom took hold. Eiri shot down all of his attempts at flirting, instead preferring to work on his manuscript that was due in a little less than two weeks.

Shuichi twisted around his chair so that he was facing the row behind him. "Fujisakiiii."

"Shhh!" Sakano had a finger in front of his mouth, desperately praying Shuichi would _shut up_. He whispered, "Seguchi-san and Fujisaki-kun are asleep back here!"

Shuichi knew that was only half true. Suguru's arms were folded loosely on his stomach and his head was pillowed comfortably on his older cousin's shoulder. It was a natural sleep. Tohma, on the other hand, was given such a powerful narcotic that Shuichi wasn't sure if his boss would ever wake up again. Which was a good thing, considering who was in the row behind him.

"Shuichi-kun," whispered Yoshiki from two rows away, "if you're bored, why not work on some lyrics?"

"Yeah," said Hiro from his left. "That's why we're going to New York, isn't it?"

"Yeah, but my inspiration," said Shuichi in a whiny tone as he pointed accusingly at Eiri, "is ignoring me!"

The sound of a gun cocking came from the third row beside Yoshiki and suddenly it was quiet again. Shuichi stared at K with wibbly eyes, upset that the American didn't even seem to care how he was being snubbed by his lover. How dare he not care!

"Yukiiii," whined Shuichi and turned to his right, staring up at the novelist with tearful eyes. "At least talk to me! It's okay if we don't kiss, but come on! I'm your boyfriend! Don't ignore me!"

Eiri didn't even look up. His fingers tapped keys rhythmically and it was so fast that Shuichi wondered if Eiri was typing words or if he was only keysmashing. Maybe Eiri was just that good. Maybe beautiful words just dripped like honey from Eiri's fingertips.

"Shuichi," said K menacingly as he aimed his gun directly in the middle of Shuichi's forehead.

"I'll be quiet!" Shuichi slumped in his chair. If this hadn't been a private jet, K would have been thrown off and treated like a terrorist. Lucky for K, not so much for Shuichi.

"Good!" Shuichi, along with every other passenger who was awake except for K, wondered if K realized the sound of a gun shooting Shuichi in the head would make more noise than Shuichi talking. Probably not. It was always shoot first and ask questions later with him—with all Americans, it seemed.

Suddenly, Sakano made a horrible gasping noise like a vocal fish that had been dragged out of the water and was dying from asphyxia. Shuichi, Eiri, Hiro, and Yoshiki looked at him, all wearing various confused expressions.

"What is it, Sakano-san?"

"Th—The _medicine_," moaned Sakano as he held up a small bottle. Shuichi recognized it as the one K used when hiding the sleeping medication in Tohma's lunch earlier in the day.

"What about the medicine?" Hiro prodded.

"The effects—the effects only—they only last up to eleven hours!"

Everyone's gaze moved from Sakano to Yoshiki, who merely pointed at herself. Everyone seemed to mutually understand this as _I'm going to die _and they all nodded their heads.

"Well, we tried," said Hiro as he leaned back in his chair. "Can't say we didn't."

"It was nice knowing you, Kitazawa's little brother—er, sister," said Shuichi. He waved bon voyage to Yoshiki with tears in his eyes.

Eiri shrugged his shoulders. "He's not awake yet and if all of you keep making so much noise, he'll just die that much sooner."

"She," Yoshiki and Shuichi simultaneously corrected.

"Whatever. _She _might as well be an earthworm and go reproduce on her own—which won't be possible if you idiots end up waking Seguchi."

"Don't be so mean, Yuki!" Shuichi cried out and clung to Eiri's arm, shaking it a little. "She's still a person, even if she's Kitazawa's sibling!"

"Stop shaking me. You'll make me drop my laptop, you little prick."

"Yukiii!"

"What's going on?" came a sleepy voice that floated from the second row. Everyone gasped in unison and sank down in their seats.

Suguru rubbed his eyes and stared around. "…What?"

"We thought Seguchi-san woke up!" wailed Shuichi.

"Shuichi, quit being so loud," said Hiro with a sigh. "If _you _wake up Seguchi-san, Yoshiki's death will be _your _responsibility."

"I don't wanna be responsible for someone's death! I can't deal with that kind of burden! And I don't wanna walk around with this big gloomy shadow hanging over my head and voices whispering in my ear _it's all your fault_, ahhh!"

"Shuichi!" Hiro clamped a hand over Shuichi's mouth. "Didn't you hear Sakano-san? The medicine will wear off soon and he'll be easy to wake!"

Shuichi offered a muffled, incoherent reply.

Suguru turned a sleepy gaze to his cousin. "Oh… He's asleep? I didn't know Seguchi-san could fall asleep on planes."

"He had a little help," said Eiri from his place in the first row. "Don't worry, kid, he'll be waking up soon and then the real fun will begin."

Sakano buried his face in his hands and wept. "The president will kill Yoshiki-kun and it will be all my fault because I'm the one who scheduled this flight for everyone!"

Eiri rolled his eyes and went back to his manuscript. If everyone would just shut up, Tohma probably wouldn't wake up until the plane landed. Were these people smart enough to realize that? No, they weren't.

"I should be all right," said Yoshiki as she picked at her shirt. "My hair is long again, my surgery is finished and I'm wearing a skirt. I don't think Seguchi-san will mistake me for my brother."

"He will if you use your _man voice_," Eiri sneered.

"Okay!" shouted K and stood up. "I have a solution!"

That quieted everyone and all the other passengers minus Eiri and Tohma stared expectantly at him.

"If Tohma makes a move to kill Yoshiki, I'll just…" K aimed his pistol at the back of Tohma's head. "Bang! Give him a little loving tap on the head."

"Don't shoot the president!" Sakano cried, standing and covering Tohma's head with his upper body.

"Don't shoot my cousin!" shouted Suguru at the same time, clinging to Tohma's arm.

"Please get off me…."

The plane fell silent and all eyes were on Tohma.

"Se—Seguchi-san?" whispered Shuichi. Hiro elbowed him hard in the side, giving him a look that meant _shut the hell up_.

"Told you," said Eiri simply.

"President!"

"Seguchi-saaan…." Suguru clutched as his cousin's sleeve and glanced nervously back at K and Yoshiki. "G—Go back to sleep, Seguchi-san. We're not there yet and you look like you could use a bit more rest."

"I can't… sleep with Sakano-san squeezing the life out of me."

"President!"

"Sakano-san, please get off."

Sakano looked at K who was still aiming the gun at Tohma's head. Disobey an order and risk his job or save the life of his president. "N—No."

The plane was once again stunned into silence. Suguru and Sakano stared pleadingly at K who shrugged his shoulders, sat down and placed the pistol in his lap.

Sakano immediately released Tohma and sat stiffly in his chair, his hands curled into fists in his lap as he stared down, tears streaming down his face. Suguru kept a tight grip on Tohma's sleeve and Yoshiki kept quiet with a bright smile on her face. Apparently, she wasn't afraid to die.

Tohma pressed a hand against his forehead. "Ah… My head feels fuzzy."

Nobody, for various reasons, wanted to explain why. Especially not Sakano who hadn't realized K had spiked the lunch he had handmade for Tohma with sleeping medication.

"Oh, Eiri-san…." Tohma gripped the back of Eiri's seat and pulled himself forward. Since Suguru still hadn't let go, he was pulled forward as well. Tohma raised an eyebrow at his cousin before returning his gaze to his brother-in-law.

"Yeah?"

Tohma rested his chin on Eiri's shoulder and ignored the murderous glare he was receiving from Shuichi.

"…Ah, somehow… I forgot what I was going to say."

"I'm surprised you didn't OD him, K."

"OD?" echoed Tohma. He pushed himself away from Eiri's chair and turned to look at the row behind him. K shoved Yoshiki's head below the seats and out of Tohma's line of sight just in time.

"It's my fault!" cried Sakano and he grabbed Tohma's arm and buried his face into his employer's shoulder.

K fired a warning shot. The bullet just barely missed both Tohma and Sakano. "Everyone sit down and face forward," he said, keeping his hand on top of Yoshiki's head. Everyone, Tohma included, obeyed. The occupants of the plane were silent for ten minutes—a new record—until Shuichi just couldn't keep quiet.

"Are we _there _yet?"

"Shindou-san," murmured Suguru with a note of disappointment in his voice. "You were asking that an hour into the flight."

"New York is far away, okay!"

"I know that, Shindou-san, but our flight lands at 23:00 and it's only 18:42!"

"Ohh, you're so mean, Fujisaki!"

"M—Mean.… I'm only stating the facts."

Tohma groaned and buried his face in his hands. "You're all so noisy…."

"A—Ah, I'm sorry, Seguchi-san," whispered Suguru.

In the third row, Yoshiki was trying to sit up in her seat, but K refused to let her head get any higher than an inch beneath the top of the seats. Apparently, she would be spending the next four hours and eighteen minutes in a half-crouching position.

Tohma closed his eyes and used Sakano's shoulder as a pillow. Shuichi, Hiro, Suguru, Sakano and K all stared expectantly at their boss, hoping he would go back to sleep so Yoshiki wouldn't have horrible neck cramps at the end of the flight.

"Maybe Seguchi-san would fall asleep if I sang him a lullaby," offered Shuichi.

"No thank you," came Tohma's instant reply.

"What? Why not? I have a nice voice! It could put you to sleep!"

"Be quiet or I'll fire you."

Eiri snorted in laughter and Shuichi groaned and shifted in his seat. "Seguchi-san is such a grouch when he wakes up," he whispered into Eiri's ear.

"Or maybe Seguchi just doesn't want to hear you sing some shitty lullaby."

"You, too?"

Eiri merely shrugged his shoulders.

Within the next hour, at one point or another, they had all realized what Suguru had previously said—Tohma doesn't fall asleep on planes. So, while Tohma's head may have been a little foggy, they all came to realize that Tohma would not naturally fall asleep.

K got tired of waiting. With one hand, he rummaged around his bag and pulled out a bottle containing clear liquid and a towel. He let go of Yoshiki's head for a moment, put on surgical gloves, then dampened the towel with the liquid. Yoshiki watched and was smart enough not to try and sit up yet.

In a series of fluid motions, K stood up, put Tohma in a headlock, and covered his employer's mouth and nose with the soaking wet towel.

"Ah! K-san! What are you doing?" Sakano cried out.

Suguru just watched in slight horror, his jaw slightly dropped.

"Putting Tohma to sleep."

"Let go of me!" K wasn't in the mood to obey his superior, so he refused to let go and held the towel firmly in front of Tohma's face.

"Pr—President…!"

"K-san, isn't that a little harsh?" Shuichi was beginning to think tossing Yoshiki out of the plane window would be best for everyone, including Yoshiki herself.

It took a little over a minute, but eventually, Tohma slumped in his chair, not quite asleep but definitely not fully aware.

"Was that really necessary, K-san?" Suguru cried out.

Sakano gripped Tohma's shoulders and shook him a little. "Seguchi-san, President, sir…! Are you okay?"

Whatever Tohma said, it was completely incoherent.

"You can sit up now," K said to Yoshiki.

She did so, hesitantly. "Is he going to be okay? Chloroform is pretty dangerous…."

"He'll be fine!" said K with a big smile. He put the damp cloth in a ziplock bag, sealed it, then put the plastic bag inside his carry-on.

"All of this," said Eiri as he shut his laptop, "just to visit some has-been idol who's babysitting a little kid."

"Sakuma-san isn't a has-been!" Shuichi whined.

"Can it, brat."

"But—"

"I said put a cork in it!"

Shuichi sat silently and pouted at Hiro instead. Hiro simply gave both Eiri and Shuichi an apologetic smile.

"The next person who speaks," said Eiri in a low voice, "will be featured in my upcoming novel, playing the part of the hooker who ends up alone and diseased."

That seemed to do it. For the next four hours, things were silent. Every now and then, K would shove the chloroform covered towel in Tohma's face whenever he seemed to be regaining full consciousness.

In fact, things seemed almost perfect until Shuichi sneezed.

"Ah, gesundheit," said Suguru.

Eiri shot him a glare, opened up his laptop again and started typing.


End file.
